Author: Phil Lengthorn

I’ll be on strike!

~ Phil Lengthorn ~ 1 Comment

After watching Look North last night on TV I was compelled to blog….

The headline: parent to sue school over closure. I don't really have to go into details, just to say this particular school is going to close on 1st October because of the joint NUT/NASUWT strike action; this particular parent is not happy. In fact he is so unhappy he has written a 'strongly worded letter' to the school.

I have sympathy with parents who have childcare issues but I don't think he quite understands the impact this government is having on the education system: the education system is becoming disjointed. The failure of the government to enter into talks aimed at reaching an agreement has lead to the industrial action. The majority of teachers are concerned that the changes the government are imposing on the profession is having an effect on the recruitment and retention of teachers and the delivery of quality education for pupils. I am one of these teachers.

The unions have tried writing a 'strongly worded letter' – this hasn't worked – that is why teachers are striking – the government now needs to enter into talks to resolve the issues.

As for our lorry driving friend who is going to sue his child's school……let's just imagine he is a Tesco supermarket lorry driver….would he like a letter from my lawyer when there are no baked beans on the shelves?

 

Boom!

~ Phil Lengthorn ~ 5 Comments

How is the training going for the half-marathon I hear you ask? You still on target to beat your PB?

Well….'sort of' is my reply.

Over the last couple of weeks I've completed a few long runs at a pretty decent pace. Although all slower than my target pace for the half. The furthest I've run at target pace is about six miles and that was a struggle in the last mile or so. So still of plenty of hard work required in the next few weeks.

This morning I attended Peterborough Parkrun and I had decided to run it without a watch. This meant starting off running fast and trying to maintain it. It paid off, new Parkrun PB: 19.37.

Lovely jubbly!

 

The day my love affair with ‘Trivial Pursuit’ ended….

~ Phil Lengthorn ~ 2 Comments

I have always loved 'Trivial Pursuit', although it has probably been 20 years since I lasted played it. Even now I am not entirely sure why it has taken so long, I have had the idea of playing it swimming around my head for years, just never quite got round to playing it.

So Saturday arrived and it was time to head into the garage and retrieve the dusty blue box from the bottom of a box of 'crap'. To my delight it was complete: board, questions, cheeses and even a dice.

The time was fixed: Saturday evening. The opponents: old. The stakes were high: £10,000* to the winners.

Playing the original 'Trivial Pursuit', circa 1983, clearly gave our older opponents an advantage. They promptly got off to an early lead and within half hour of the start they had bagged three cheeses, due in part to their extensive knowledge of anything pre-1950s.

A mid-game break involving the eating of a fantastic home-made Banoffee Pie** was our chance to claw our way back.

After a couple of hours of intense questioning and answering, the 'oldies', clearly lacking endurance, had faltered and we were all square: six cheeses each and all heading for the middle and the finale. We each had a couple of opportunities to win the game only to be thwarted by impossible questions. Then it happened: the moment my love-affair with 'Trivial Pursuit' ended.

Our opponents once again reached the middle. We needed to pick a category. They had been struggling with green all night, Science and Nature. We choose green. The question:

What are the three usual flavours in Neapolitan ice cream?

Yes, you read that correct!! What are the three frigging flavours in frigging Neapolitan ice cream!! Since when is that a science or nature question!!! As you can imagine they answered the question correctly and we were left reeling. Cheated out of a victory by the makers: Horn Abbot International Ltd. They will certainly be hearing from my lawyers shortly.

As for the game, that is back in the garage at the bottom of the box of 'crap' never to be seen again!

* This was later changed to the losers do the washing up.

** Made with my own fair hands.

 

Running, indulging the doolally and univocalism….

~ Phil Lengthorn ~ 1 Comment

This morning my 'lovely' half-marathon training plan exclaimed that I should do a long 'steady' run of 12 miles, yes you read that right, 12 miles! Not quite sure why it wants me to run so far considering I still have five weeks until race day. But not wanting to upset the fecking thing, that is exactly what I did.

12.65 miles in a time of 1:38.38. Average pace 7.48 per mile.

Still slightly slower than target pace (although I had to go through various gates, cross roads and climb hills), but it felt good!

I had planned a slightly different route that enabled me to pop into a shop and get a drink at about halfway so that I didn't have to bother carrying a bottle throughout. Also, I had even created a new playlist to accompany me on the run. Get me!

Yesterday included a trip to Peterborough for a bit of a wander about. Once there we stumbled upon The Peterborough Arts Fest – a celebration of Peterborough and its people. With the rather catchy tagline of 'Indulge the Doolally'. According to the programme, we were promised, “jaw dropping spectaculars”, “internationally acclaimed acts” and an “extraordinary finale”. What we actually experienced was an event that nobody seemed to know about, there were very few people about, and actually very few acts performing. So, as you can imagine, we didn't hang around for the “extraordinary finale”. Although I did manage a picture sitting on a massive deckchair (small things and all that)…..

But also, more excitingly, performing in the Talkative Tent (sponsored by John Clare Cottage) were Dead Poets….

Dead Poets are made up of Mark Grist, him of poetry slam fame….

….and DJ Mixy, the pair formed the collaboration to challenge the preconceptions of poetry and hip-hop. If you get a chance to seem them you should, it's a very entertaining performance. Today was no different, Mark performed a piece of univocal poetry entitled 'The Fens' which was very clever. Univocalism is a poem that uses only one vowel, here is a rather poor attempt….

Jog to Morton

Born to jog,

Sort of hobby,

Good to go.

North from town,

Off to woods,

Lots to look.

Dogs too jolly,

Poop on boot,

Not good look.

Cows in fog,

Not to worry,

Jog on strong.

Boozy horror show,

Bosoms and knobs,

Long story.

Grotty old dog,

Soggy from ponds,

Looks odd.

Horror show,

Jog too slow,

School tomorrow.

In other news, Frank Hamilton has released his first, what he calls, 'serious' video….

 

I move slow and steady…

~ Phil Lengthorn ~ 2 Comments

Four weeks ago I decided to enter the Peterborough Half Marathon and attempt to beat my PB, currently standing at….

Since then I have been following a training plan, tweaking it in places, running a few races in between, but pretty much sticking to exactly what I am supposed to be doing. It seems to be going ok, except that my target pace of 7.22 min/mile seems REALLY fast. Now I will say at this point that I knew this would be the case; I set my PB a few years ago when I was younger, running more and entering more races. I knew it would be difficult: it is a 'proper' challenge. But recently I'm beginning to think that it might be a bit of a struggle to actually beat the time.

Last weekend I ran the Grimsthorpe 10K, it was a warm morning, it's a tough course, multi terrain: concrete, grass, gravel, track, in fact at one stage, as we approached the lake, I was half expecting to have to run on water. I completed it in 46.12…

But the important stat is the average pace: 7.26 min/mile. Actually slower than the pace I need to run for the half-marathon, and this was only 6ish miles, and I was absolutely knackered at the finish. I have to run double that distance! Now, as I said earlier, it is a tough course, but all the same it's got me thinking. Is this challenge achievable?

So we eventaully get to the part why I called this post 'I move slow and steady'…..

It seems that whenever I go for a run I always seem to be chasing a target time or target pace. Club training sessions are really hard work, even 'steady' paced runs are done with the idea that I should be running pretty close to my target race pace. I haven't really had much chance to 'enjoy' the running. So you can imagine my delight when I looked at the training plan and had a couple of days running at an 'easy' pace. Now I'm not entirely sure what my 'easy' pace should be, I think I read somewhere that I can run them at a minute slower? So what I did was run them at a lovely 9 min/mile pace (probably far too slow) and really enjoyed them. It was great to just run. If I wanted to run fast downhill, I did! If I wanted to drop the pace for an uphill section, I did! If I wanted to jog slowly, I did! If I wanted to pick up the pace for a bit, I did! I just really enjoyed it. So from here on in I'll be running a few more 'easy' runs. I'm not giving up on achieving a PB in the half-marathon, just going to try to do it with a few more 'enjoyable' runs thrown in.

 

A godson, a baptism and a letter….

~ Phil Lengthorn ~ 2 Comments

Yesterday my beautiful nephew became my beautiful godson….

Stanley was baptised. It was a fantastic day, my sister and her husband had thought of everything, everyone enjoyed themselves and the day went off without any problems at all. But then I began to think a bit more about the day. It was Stanley's day. It was his baptism. So I began to wonder what sort of day HE had had.

A letter from Stanley….

Dear Mum and Dad,

Thanks for a great day on Sunday, although it was a little bit different to our usual Sunday. Normally I'm allowed to chill in my cot for a bit and then get to have a very lazy day being played with and generally have a very relaxed morning. Today I didn't get a chance to relax at all. From the moment I woke up it was panic. I was put into an outfit I have never worn before and had to put up with ooooos and aaaahs from everybody I met for the rest of the day. Let alone being forced to wear a hat that I tried to make clear I wasn't impressed with, but you kept stuffing on my head.

We then went to this huge place that I have never been to before, although from what I understand you should have been taking me regularly since my birth. I met loads of people, all intent on cuddling and kissing me. If that wasn't bad enough I was passed to this fella in a black outfit who promptly tipped a load of water on my head. It's no wonder I zonked out.

I also understand that I have some lovely godparents, but they seemed more eager to show off my certificate than actually allowing me to be in the pictures.

Also, considering it was MY day I was a bit surprised that you let my sister play with all MY presents and eat the sweets that had been given to me. I can't wait until I'm a bit older, I am so going to get my own back.

At one stage I started to get very worried when a knife started to get waved about, especially because of the crazy face you were pulling. Although the cake was lovely, I had enough of it stuffed into my gob throughout the day.

But overall, I had a fantastic day and would like to say thanks.

Love

Stanley