Month: October 2012

Zombie Evacuation

~ Phil Lengthorn ~ 8 Comments

Today saw four brave souls, Dead Men Running, attempt to complete a zombie infested 5km run….

Great example of teamwork – one hold phone, one press button!

A ‘short’ walk to the Zombie Evacuation HQ on a very cold and windy morning was enough to bring us to the edge of collapse before we had even seen a zombie.

Liability waiver was signed and timing chip, belt and tags collected. The liability waiver did not help to ease our fears:

‘The risk of injury and/or death from the activities involved in the Zombie

Evacuation Race and the Event is significant’

But we are a simple group of blokes and after a coffee and a KitKat, the standard zombie runners breakfast, we were feeling more confident and ready to face the zombie hordes.

Our allotted evacuation wave time quickly approached and we were ready and in postion to begin. We jogged to an assembly point on the edge of the infected zone where team tactics were quickly discussed. It was decided that we would stay together at all costs and if necessary risk possible zombie infection for the good of the team. After a quick briefing from the head of operations we began to jog ahead in a surprisingly light-hearted mood. This was soon to end because within 30 seconds we were running for our life, amongst smoke and dead corpses, after a zombie attack. At this point it was clear it was every man for himself, Simon pushing other runners to the side, Dave violently pushing me into a ditch in an attempt to save himself.

Over the 5km course we encountered various obstacles (logs, fences, walls, barbed wire, forest, mud, mine fields, rope bridges), what seemed like 1000s of zombies, and managed to just about stay together as a team. Only on a few occasions did the pressure of virus-infected zombies cause any team issues:

  • Early on Neil lost his hat which I bravely went back for, despite the cries from Dave of “leave it – it’s just a hat”.
  • On a particularly muddy part, Simon was seen walking over Neil to reach the top of the ridge.
  • At a rope walking obstacle again Simon was seen disrupting Neil’s progress by excessive swinging on the rope, nearly causing a zombie to infect him.
  • Trees twanged back into team mates faces…
  • Lots of needless shoving and grabbing for reassurance (the zombies were actually really scary!)

 

As we approached the end of the course Dave was the only member of Dead Men Running not to be infected, due to some decidedly ‘gay’ hand wafting around his hips, and it was decided that we would do ANYTHING to get him home in one piece. To cries of, “We’ll get you back Dave!”, we faced the final horde of zombies. Final outcome: 3 infected, 1 survivor. Good job Dave!

Escaping zombies makes you happy!

Overall it was a great day, and despite the ‘screaming like a bunch of girls’ I was very proud of the boys! A well earned pint was the reward…..

Dave was keen to tell EVERYONE he knew that he was the only survivor!

Operation Dead Men Running

~ Phil Lengthorn ~ 2 Comments

With only 2 days until the Zombie Evacuation I thought it was only right to take stock of our readiness to escape the zombie hordes…..

'Dead Men Running' are a group of highly intelligent young men trained in the art of zombie evasion. Years of watching such films as 'Dawn of the Dead', 'Zombieland' and 'Shaun of the Dead' have enabled this group of elite zombie runners to perfect their skills. Living seemingly normal lives as teachers, these individuals have made it their role in life to escape the undead. Normal people would turn into gibbering wrecks at the sight of hungry, blood-thirsty, zirus-spreading zombies, but not this band of brave souls…..

Phil 'The Guv'nor' Lengthorn

Age: 25

Background: Brought up during the early days of VHS by a father who was obsessed with horror films.

Specialisms: Lightning quick, natural leader with extensive knowledge of George A Romero.

Dave 'Mental' Marples

Age: Unknown

Background: Originally from up norf, so used to running after robbers and away from muggers.

Specialisms: Organised, tactically aware and has seen Zombieland over 1000 times.

Neil 'Badass' Rawes

Age: Classified

Background: Raised by mutant mountain men in the heart of Rutland.

Specialisms: Head of communications, quick witted and the ability to confuse.

Simon 'Numbers' Free

Age: Unavailable

Background: Created during a freak algebra experiment in the 1970s.

Specialism: Counting.

May the odds be ever in your favour….

Birthday Wishes and Muddy Running

~ Phil Lengthorn ~ 4 Comments

Yesterday was my most favourite niece's 1st Birthday and to celebrate we made the trip to Kent to spend the day with her. Firstly, let me just say that since the birth of Grace my sister has gone slightly mad. And considering she is once again pregnant things are only going to get worse. On arrival we were forced given our own hand-made party hat to wear.

Jill had gone all out to make sure we had a great day: loads of food; birthday decorations; home-made cake; AND party games. Although I was slightly disappointed not to have won pass-the-parcel, amazingly Grace won it, what are the chances of that? Grace got some lovely presents, including her first doll named 'Baby Gracie' which she was very intrigued by. We all had a great day….

This morning the plan was to get very muddy with a run on the trails of Bourne Woods.

I had the iPhone for some pictures and had the Zombies, Run! app on the go. I had already decided on a pretty gentle run this morning and once I spotted how muddy the trails were a gentle run was the only option.

Pretty much covered most of the trails including the hilly ones, did loads of slipping and sliding, which actually reminded me of this ice-skating outing….

Billy Boy was with me this morning, so after about 4 miles we headed to the ponds so he could cool down and clean himself off a bit.

Overall a good run around the woods, loads of people out enjoying the morning, and I did indeed finish very muddy….

Same again tomorrow? Yes please!

 

An educational trip to Alton Towers…

~ Phil Lengthorn ~ 2 Comments

I can hear the shouts:

“Alton Towers ain't educational!”

“You're having a tin bath!!?”

But yesterday saw around ninety Rutland County College staff and students travel to Alton Towers in Staffordshire for the annual trip. In the past this trip was for Psychology students only, but this year it had been opened up to all college students.

In the preparation for this trip AS Level Psychology students had designed an experiment to test the effects of stress on memory. The idea being that different intensity of rides will have a different effect on participants being able to remember things. We await the results with baited breath.

As for the day as a whole, it went fantastically well with no issues or dramas. Even the responsible adults managed to enjoy themselves…

The park wasn't very busy and queue time was pretty good, the longest wait was about 15min. We managed to get on virtually all the rides we wanted to, even some we didn't.

As is normal for a trip to Alton Towers, there is usually a 'new' ride to go on, and today was no different: Nemesis Sub Terra. After various reviews from students that included 'rubbish', 'really scary' and 'you get squirted with egg', it was decided that four brave souls would risk it. Nemesis Sub Terra is loosely themed on the park's famous Nemesis ride and revolves around the discovery of eggs from this original monster. Anyway, to cut a long story short it means you enter a mock lift to see said egg only for an alarm to sound, people to poke you, shout at you, move you around into mock lift again, chase you down a very dark alley with various scary people/objects inside before exiting into daylight. Dave managed to sum it up in three words: “very unpleasant experience”.

Towards the end of the day we were left with probably the biggest dilemma of the day and one we took an age to decide, do we risk getting wet on the Congo River Rapids….?

After much deliberation it was decided that we would risk it, and despite a surprise squirt attack from the bank by some local yobs, all was well.

Overall, a really good day out, really well organised and impeccable behaviour by all except maybe some inappropriate language on the occasion roller-coaster.

 

Great Eastern Run

~ Phil Lengthorn ~ 5 Comments

A lovely bright morning welcomed all runners of the Great Eastern Run to Peterborough. The course has changed slightly to last year, it now starts on the Embankment rather than in the city centre, but more importantly, it is still 13.1 miles long.

The past three weeks training has been pretty non-existent due to various niggling injuries. Therefore today's plan was a nice steady pace. Got to halfway in 52 mins, and feeling pretty good, ran the second half in 50 mins. Finishing in a pretty respectable time of 1.42 which I was happy with considering the last month. You can probably tell that the race was pretty uneventful, Peterborough is not known for its fantastic scenery, although I did spot what I think was a tree at one point. But I was given a goody bag, medal and a ridiculously bright t-shirt for my efforts.

The real fun and games began at the finish….

Firstly, when I went to pick up bag from the storage point, they couldn't find it. I had to hang about watching some bloke desperately searching for it, at the annoyance to other runners. I had borrowed Amy's rucksack because mine had somehow disappeared. Therefore when asked what colour it was I said it was black, which I thought it was, it was in fact more of a grey. Doh!

Secondly, I had parked in the closest car park, not realising that the exit to the car park was actually on the race route. Therefore, it was not opened until most of the runners had finished. So in conclusion it took me an hour and forty minutes to run the race and the same amount of time to exit the car park!

And now for something completely different….

A crazy Austrian man jumped from 24 miles up in the air in an attempt to break the sound barrier….

And….he did it!

Bunting, Books and Bungle

~ Phil Lengthorn ~ 3 Comments

The final week of the first term is finally over and since it has been one whole week since the last blog entry *bows head in shame* I feel I should write something, even if very little has actually happened.

My classroom is now the owner of beautiful new energy efficient lighting. Fitted after school on Thursday to enable a day's trial, before a decision was made to fit them throughout the block late on Friday. Although this is great news, being able to see students in the classroom I feel is an essential part of teaching, it did threaten our chances for winning a tin of chocolates. Earlier on in the week my tutor group had completely decorated the room in Union Jack bunting to celebrate 'Red, White and Blue Day' to bag said chocolates in a school competition. I had, of course, completely forgotten that the engineer would appear on Thursday to fit lights, bunting was taken down, as was our chances of winning the competition.

A visit to the school library meant a collection of teenage fiction to read over the holiday….

Not that I'd actually get round to reading them because of the MASSIVE stack of marking I have to do….

Friday evening came to a close with a walk into town to partake in a few pints of the black stuff in a local hostelry. Who should be at the bar when I arrived? One of my neighbours, already slightly the worse for wear. It was quite easy to recognise this due to the fact that despite being neighbours for three and a half years he didn't seem to know who I was, he shook my hand and said, “I know you from somewhere”. After giving him a couple of clues the penny finally dropped, before he began to introduce me to all his equally drunk mates. The next half hour was spent discussing such subjects as: literature, education, darts, beer and….. the 80s TV show Rainbow…mainly because one of them had the nickname 'Bungle', and did look surprisingly like him…