Category: Blog

My general wonderings…

Origami #17 and some general wonderings….

~ Phil Lengthorn ~ 1 Comment

Over halfway through November's Challenge and it feels like I have been creating paper stuff for months. I'm also very aware that a blog post about a piece of paper folded up a ridiculous amount of times to create something that may or may not look like what it is supposed to look like may be beginning to get slightly tedious. So today's blog is being expanded into, to quote the blog's tagline, 'general wonderings'.

Firstly, let me get the whole origami thing out the way. Been creating a lot of animals lately so how about another box…..only 23 steps, but classed as 'difficult'….a starbox….#17….

The day started off with a run around Bourne Woods with the dog, left at about 9am, it felt pretty mild out for a November morning. I was ready for a lovely muddy run on the trails – and that was exactly what I got. At one point it was so muddy that the dog had to stop to check I was going to follow him. Came back caked in mud, trainers are on radiator to dry out, me thinks same again in the morning.

After a shower I had a walk into town to visit the Post Office to send a parcel. That was an experience. What is it with people that go to the Post Office? The people behind the counter are slow enough, but the people going up to the counter are worse. They go to the window with what seems like a letter to post and end up filling in a form, asking endless questions, counting money, paying by card, and then you hear them say “just one more thing my love”…..argh! I needed a visit to Costa just to relax…..

This evening I donned my wellies for a short stroll around Elsea Woods before it got to dark. I was greeted with a lovely early evening sky…..

For the rest of the evening I will be avoiding 'Strictly Come Dancing' and eating beef!

 

What a day!

~ Phil Lengthorn ~ 4 Comments

Remember, remember the fifth of November,

A long day, piglet and cults.

Today was a very long and stressful day. It has felt like everything has been against me:

  • I have a stack of marking that, despite my best efforts, does not seem to be going down.
  • I was not really ‘feeling it’ today.
  • The kids have been slightly crazy today. Even my ‘lovely’ Y11s were also not really ‘feeling it’ either. Even a spontaneous bit of Zumba in the classroom failed to shift the negative feeling that was banging around.
  • iPad has less that 4% battery life left – Apple make the shortest ever charging cable in the history of the world so that it is impossible to work and charge it.
  • I made an origami piglet that ‘apparently’ looks more like a rhino (see below).
  • I’ve got work to do but can’t be bothered.
  • The paper is rectangle and not square which is a problem for an origami master like myself.
  • The dog thinks I am mean all because he is a big girl and is stressing out about the fireworks.
  • Blogsy, the app I usually use for posting blogs, has decided that it wants to mess me around as well.
  • All in all I am feeling very sorry for myself.

 

I also found out today that my sister lives in a strange town that offers sacrifices to their God in the form of rather bizarre bonfire Guys. Lance Armstrong was this year’s sacrifice, just ahead of Jimmy Savile and George Osbourne. My sister took part in last night’s procession through the streets of Edenbridge before Reverend Bonfire helped conduct some sort of mass cult prayer session before the effigy was lit to cries of “burn him, burn him!”.

I will be keeping a close eye on my sister’s behaviour in future, although the giant Wicker Man she has erected in her garden is causing some concern.

And so to Day 5 of November’s Challenge to produce one piece of origami per day. Continuing the recent animal theme, a piglet is today’s offering….

Here is Billy hiding like a girl in the cupboard because of the fireworks….

In an attempt to lighten my mood I resorted to the genius of Terry Hall, in his guise of lead singer of Fun Boy Three, that didn’t work either…..

Frostbite and a rabbit…..

~ Phil Lengthorn ~ 1 Comment

Today it was race 2 in the Frostbite Friendly League hosted by Bushfield Runners. A 5-miler starting and finishing at Bushfield's Leisure Centre near Peterborough. When I left home at around 9.30am all seemed good. When I got to the race is was no longer 'all good'. It was absolutely pissing it down! Walked to race HQ in rain. Warmed up in the rain. Ran the race in the rain. Walked back to the car in the rain. I was wet through and just wanted to get home.

Finished in 145th place in a pretty decent time of 34.06, less than 7 min/mile pace, so couldn't moan too much. But a shower, a lovely bacon and egg baguette and cup of tea and I was sorted.

As for November's Challenge, the traditional art of Japanese paper folding, may I present a rabbit….

Now I understand it may look a tiny bit like a donkey or a dog, but I can assure you it is a rabbit, the app says so….

I can't quite understand how their rabbit is looking slightly more happy and proud than my slightly depressed looking rabbit. I think a visit to the art department tomorrow to steal borrow some coloured paper may be required.

 

Zombie Evacuation

~ Phil Lengthorn ~ 8 Comments

Today saw four brave souls, Dead Men Running, attempt to complete a zombie infested 5km run….

Great example of teamwork – one hold phone, one press button!

A ‘short’ walk to the Zombie Evacuation HQ on a very cold and windy morning was enough to bring us to the edge of collapse before we had even seen a zombie.

Liability waiver was signed and timing chip, belt and tags collected. The liability waiver did not help to ease our fears:

‘The risk of injury and/or death from the activities involved in the Zombie

Evacuation Race and the Event is significant’

But we are a simple group of blokes and after a coffee and a KitKat, the standard zombie runners breakfast, we were feeling more confident and ready to face the zombie hordes.

Our allotted evacuation wave time quickly approached and we were ready and in postion to begin. We jogged to an assembly point on the edge of the infected zone where team tactics were quickly discussed. It was decided that we would stay together at all costs and if necessary risk possible zombie infection for the good of the team. After a quick briefing from the head of operations we began to jog ahead in a surprisingly light-hearted mood. This was soon to end because within 30 seconds we were running for our life, amongst smoke and dead corpses, after a zombie attack. At this point it was clear it was every man for himself, Simon pushing other runners to the side, Dave violently pushing me into a ditch in an attempt to save himself.

Over the 5km course we encountered various obstacles (logs, fences, walls, barbed wire, forest, mud, mine fields, rope bridges), what seemed like 1000s of zombies, and managed to just about stay together as a team. Only on a few occasions did the pressure of virus-infected zombies cause any team issues:

  • Early on Neil lost his hat which I bravely went back for, despite the cries from Dave of “leave it – it’s just a hat”.
  • On a particularly muddy part, Simon was seen walking over Neil to reach the top of the ridge.
  • At a rope walking obstacle again Simon was seen disrupting Neil’s progress by excessive swinging on the rope, nearly causing a zombie to infect him.
  • Trees twanged back into team mates faces…
  • Lots of needless shoving and grabbing for reassurance (the zombies were actually really scary!)

 

As we approached the end of the course Dave was the only member of Dead Men Running not to be infected, due to some decidedly ‘gay’ hand wafting around his hips, and it was decided that we would do ANYTHING to get him home in one piece. To cries of, “We’ll get you back Dave!”, we faced the final horde of zombies. Final outcome: 3 infected, 1 survivor. Good job Dave!

Escaping zombies makes you happy!

Overall it was a great day, and despite the ‘screaming like a bunch of girls’ I was very proud of the boys! A well earned pint was the reward…..

Dave was keen to tell EVERYONE he knew that he was the only survivor!

Operation Dead Men Running

~ Phil Lengthorn ~ 2 Comments

With only 2 days until the Zombie Evacuation I thought it was only right to take stock of our readiness to escape the zombie hordes…..

'Dead Men Running' are a group of highly intelligent young men trained in the art of zombie evasion. Years of watching such films as 'Dawn of the Dead', 'Zombieland' and 'Shaun of the Dead' have enabled this group of elite zombie runners to perfect their skills. Living seemingly normal lives as teachers, these individuals have made it their role in life to escape the undead. Normal people would turn into gibbering wrecks at the sight of hungry, blood-thirsty, zirus-spreading zombies, but not this band of brave souls…..

Phil 'The Guv'nor' Lengthorn

Age: 25

Background: Brought up during the early days of VHS by a father who was obsessed with horror films.

Specialisms: Lightning quick, natural leader with extensive knowledge of George A Romero.

Dave 'Mental' Marples

Age: Unknown

Background: Originally from up norf, so used to running after robbers and away from muggers.

Specialisms: Organised, tactically aware and has seen Zombieland over 1000 times.

Neil 'Badass' Rawes

Age: Classified

Background: Raised by mutant mountain men in the heart of Rutland.

Specialisms: Head of communications, quick witted and the ability to confuse.

Simon 'Numbers' Free

Age: Unavailable

Background: Created during a freak algebra experiment in the 1970s.

Specialism: Counting.

May the odds be ever in your favour….

Birthday Wishes and Muddy Running

~ Phil Lengthorn ~ 4 Comments

Yesterday was my most favourite niece's 1st Birthday and to celebrate we made the trip to Kent to spend the day with her. Firstly, let me just say that since the birth of Grace my sister has gone slightly mad. And considering she is once again pregnant things are only going to get worse. On arrival we were forced given our own hand-made party hat to wear.

Jill had gone all out to make sure we had a great day: loads of food; birthday decorations; home-made cake; AND party games. Although I was slightly disappointed not to have won pass-the-parcel, amazingly Grace won it, what are the chances of that? Grace got some lovely presents, including her first doll named 'Baby Gracie' which she was very intrigued by. We all had a great day….

This morning the plan was to get very muddy with a run on the trails of Bourne Woods.

I had the iPhone for some pictures and had the Zombies, Run! app on the go. I had already decided on a pretty gentle run this morning and once I spotted how muddy the trails were a gentle run was the only option.

Pretty much covered most of the trails including the hilly ones, did loads of slipping and sliding, which actually reminded me of this ice-skating outing….

Billy Boy was with me this morning, so after about 4 miles we headed to the ponds so he could cool down and clean himself off a bit.

Overall a good run around the woods, loads of people out enjoying the morning, and I did indeed finish very muddy….

Same again tomorrow? Yes please!